Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
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