A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Randomize
