what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
