I think I am morally bankrupt
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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