Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Randomize
