Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
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