Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize