My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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