she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
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