Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Randomize
