I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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