I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
