Why are handjobs necessary in class?
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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