Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
