Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
