Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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