I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize
