no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
