To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
