I cannot find my penis.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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