DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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