fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
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