Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize