I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
