all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
