Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
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