Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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