i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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