When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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