Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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