would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
