I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
i believe in u and ur pee
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