xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
