i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
