I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
