so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
All I want is dick and wine.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
