I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
