i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
