Three words: puerto rican gang bang
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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