Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Randomize
