so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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