I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
