Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
