I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize