found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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