I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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