; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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