Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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