You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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