Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Enjoy the penises
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize