after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Randomize
